Grimsley Mania!
Well the hot story right now is obviously Jason Grimsley's naming of names. If you don't feel like reading Grimsley's entire affadavit, just check out page 13. It's one of the more interesting pages, wherein Grimsley states that a certain steroid user was "very obvious and had the worst back acne he'd ever seen."
I decided to do some detective work by Googling various players' names in conjuction with "back acne." (Can you tell I was bored?) Anyway, yes, I did find many Sammy/Barry references, but I also ran into this. It's a surreal, fascinating story about Juan Gonzalez from Jeff Sullivan, and yes, back acne and baby oil make an appearance.
Given the success of that detective work, I proceeded to flip through all of Grimsley's former teammates. I then compiled a list of players who probably did not use steroids, because I figured that would be easier than picking out the ones who did. Here you go:
Mike Maddux
Terry Mulholland
John Kruk
Mickey Morandini
Felix Fermin
Billy Ripken
Randy Velarde (wait, scratch that)
J.T. Snow
Gary DiSarcina
Jim Abbott
Chuck McElroy (the glasses gave him super powers anyway)
Chuck Knoblauch
Joe Girardi
Lance Johnson
Joe Randa
Neifi Perez
Calvin Pickering (couldn't possibly get any bigger)
It's safe to assume that anyone not on this list used steroids.
How did you deduce this list?
Posted by: Zonis | June 07, 2006 at 05:01 PM
I don't really think we should give Felix Fermin the benefit of the doubt. His mustache really seems to me to be indicative of some kind of nefarious doings.
Posted by: CubsAddictMG | June 07, 2006 at 05:19 PM
Zonis, I basically looked at all of Grimsley's teammates and then picked guys who didn't seem like steroid users.
Posted by: RotoAuthority | June 07, 2006 at 05:47 PM
Agreed on Felix Fermin's stache.
Posted by: RotoAuthority | June 07, 2006 at 05:48 PM
Can one of the ten please be Neifi Dude. Then maybe the cubs can finally pass this awful kidney stone.
Posted by: fattycubs51 | June 07, 2006 at 06:55 PM
considering Alex Sanchez got caught taking something, I don't know how you can be certain about some of these guys.....steroids and HGH don't necessarily make you into Bonds or Sosa or whoever.....a player who would normally develop into a career minor leaguer can become a major leaguer with a chemical boost...
Posted by: scatterbrian | June 09, 2006 at 12:29 PM
I'm pretty sure you might want to take a longer look at Mulholland. Not for the stuff that makes you big, for the junk that is designed primarily for post surgical rehabilitation (I prefer not to name suspected substances out of respect, plus it's not like Winthrop Laboratories needs a plug). Also, IMO until proven otherwise, all these guys drink or have drank the "leaded" cofee.
Posted by: lienad | June 10, 2006 at 03:14 AM